Submitting to Him

Romans 10 v 14In case you’ve been wondering what yesterday’s “story” was all about, I’d like to explain:

As you can imagine, we’ve been having a rather hard time of it.  My husband got a short-term contract for about half of what he used to earn – he started this month.  Money is non-existent.  But I’m still here and – thanks to the wonder of free wi-fi, able to post on my blog.  And, as you can imagine – I’ve been having some battles with the Father.

A few weeks ago He said that He would remember the promise He made to me in my youth (Eze 16:60a).  At first I didn’t know what He was talking about, but then the Holy Spirit reminded me of a promise that was made years ago.  Of course, being the impatient human I am, I wanted the promise RIGHT NOW!  Nope.  Nothing.  I prayed and prayed and begged and pleaded, tried to bargain and negotiate.  But He did not answer me (1Sam 14:37b).

I was furious.  How could He remind me of that promise and then not give it to me?  How could He?  Other people are getting their promises.  Other people are prospering, even those whose mouths speak love while their hearts seek only money (Eze 33:31b).

This went on for several days, I started a seven day fast (I’ve just finished it), praying and pleading.  Asking Him why He is keeping the promise away from me while we are getting deeper and deeper in financial trouble.  I literally felt like Jacob wrestling and battling with Him (Gen 32:22-32).

And then God said:  “Who are you, little human, to question Me?  I who created all?” (Job 38; Rom 9:20)  “Are you not clay in My Hands?  Are you not merely a pot being made by Me?” (Isa 45:9)  “Do you really question what I do?” (Isa 45:11)

And then I realized three things:

  1. That I wasn’t seeking His will and His Kingdom.
  2. That I wasn’t submitting in all aspects of my life.
  3. That I wasn’t being obedient.

So, here I am, being obedient and sharing my story (Rom 10:14) with whoever comes by to read it.  I hope that somebody somewhere comes across this and takes some kind of encouragement from it.  I know from my stats that people are stopping by, but I don’t know if anybody actually reads it.  So if you’ve gotten this far, please do leave a comment and let me know, even if just to say that you did indeed read all of it.

Thank you!